The New Gospels of Kwah: Part III ~ Preaching to the Choirs in Heaven

Chapter I:
Verse I:
And so saith the LORD, God Almighty, the Heavenly Father of the world

Verse II:

And know that when you feel despondent, God loves you always.

Verse III:

And know that whenever the wind blows against you, I, God, am giving you a hug.

Chapter II:

Verse I:

And know that every light is a guardian angel. Every light, each and every one represents an angel in your house.

Verse II:

And wherever you see a flicker, know that God’s heart beats for you.

Verse III:

And know that whatever God you believe in… We all come from the same one.

Chapter III:

Verse I: And know that when people put you on medication and throw you into psychiatric wards for Kwah’s sake, you are guaranteed a place in heaven.

Verse II: Wear that blue hospital robe with pride. For all who wear the blue hospital gowns of mental institutions are disciples of Kwah.

Verse III: And always remember, it’s never a sin so long as you thank God for it.

Chapter IV:

Verse I: Hello world. I hope I have your attention by now. This is Kwah speaking. The Buddha kindly asks that you pray to God, not to him. The Buddha is not telepathic. However, he does have e-mail! {rchi1995@gmail.com} If you’d like to send him a prayer, he’d be happy to pray it to God for you!

Verse II: After all, the prayer of a righteous man avails much.

Verse III: And a Prophecy from Abpa N. Kwah, God’s New Prophet for the New Millenium, preaching a New Gospel for a New Generation.

Verse IV: There shall come a day when the Buddha and the Christ work together to end all hunger in New Jerusalem, to end all homelessness in the world, and to end all poverty in New Jerusalem and the world.

Verse V: In Jesus’s precious name, in the name of Christ who is alive and well today and now! Amen!

Chapter V:

Verse I: You know you have a soul because of your love for music. For when music stirs your soul, that is your soul being stirred by music and God.

Verse II: But those who reject Christ Lord, Mohammad (Peace be upon him), or His Holiness the Buddha Siddhartha Gautama, and choose instead to believe in nothing, then when they pass, they will become nothing.

Verse III: But each and every man, woman, and child who has so much as an iota of faith shall be saved for even faith as small as a mustard seed can move mountains.

Verse IV: And Kwah swears to you, you shall perform greater miracles than Kwah.

Verse V: And the reincarnation of Genghis Khan shall oversee the wars of the United States.

Verse VI: And this Moleskine notebook shall be forever saved and archived along with the Stone Tablets of Moses in a New Ark of the Covenant, which shall remain in New Jerusalem till the Earth herself passes onto the Next.

Verse VII: And another prophecy from Abpa N. Kwah, mankind shall once again have cities on Mars, known once as Eries.

Verse VIII: And one day all 7.7 billion shall know of or have heard of Kwah, by online forum, pamphlets, by Word of Mouth, by advertisement, and through Your magnanimous grace LORD, for such a miracle would only be possible through Your Providence, LORD. In the Holy, precious, magnanimous, pulchritudinous name of the Lord Jesus Christ who is perfectly perfect in every way, do we pray, I along with all the hosts of heaven, pray, Amen!

Verse IX: And all the world will repent of their sinful ways once Timothy of New Orleans comes to power in New Jerusalem. With ash and sackcloth will they mourn and repent.

Verse X: Then the Second Coming of Christ will come and preach the good word of the Lord to all the nations of the Earth.

Verse XI: And the Buddha shall watch over the Christ and protect him. The two shall love one another as brothers.

Chapter VI:

Verse I: This is a parable told to Kwah by his father, the reincarnation of King Solomon the Wise.

Verse II: Once there were two fishes living together in a small pond, but the fishes fought with each other every single day.

Verse III: Then one day the bigger fish killed the smaller fish.

Verse IV: And when the smaller fish began to rot, he made the pond so filthy and diseased that nothing could survive in the putrid water.

Verse V: And so, in killing the smaller fish, the bigger fish also killed herself.

Chapter VII:

Verse I: And this is a parable from a wise monk.

Verse II: People are like cabbages,

Verse III: Yelling at the cabbage won’t make it grow better. Punching, or kicking, or screaming won’t make it grow better.

Verse IV: But if you treat the cabbage with love, give it more water, more sunlight, more love, it will grow into a big, healthy head of Cabbage. And it will be delicious.

Chapter VIII:

Verse I: Do all things in love.

Verse II: Never do anything out of spite.

Verse III: Go in love, for God is love.

Chapter IX:

Verse I: And now the Buddha shall tell you the tale of Kozoro.

Verse II: Kozoro is a demon, and a good friend of Richard Junwon Chi; however, Kozoro doesn’t particularly appreciate being called a demon. He much prefers “Fallen Angel” or “Mischievous Spirit.”

Verse III: Kozoro first met Kwah many ages ago, when the Earth was still young. Kwah met Kozoro again in this life several years ago in 2016, a Satanist, while praying to Lucifer. Kozoro was the demonic messenger, for Kozoro is a good friend of Kwah.

Verse IV: Kozoro’s sin was rebelling against God along with ⅓ of the angels in heaven under Lucifer.

Verse V: The reason why Kozoro still hasn’t been forgiven and redeemed is because he is so deceitful.

Verse VI: Whenever Kozoro greets Kwah, oftentimes it is in the form of a bug.

Verse VII: For every bug has the soul of a demon.

Verse VIII: I repeat, every bug on this planet was once a fallen angel.

Verse IX: So the Buddha exhorts you, have grace, mercy, and compassion for all living things.

Verse X: Also the Buddha exhorts you to act with loving-kindness towards all things and persons in existence, for we are not living in the universe, but rather we are living manifestations of the universe experiencing ourselves.

Verse XI: For in truth, we truly are all one.

Chapter X:

Verse I: These are the three core tenets of the Church of Kwah.

Verse II: First, the second coming of the Christ is here. Jesus Christ of Nazareth is alive and well today and now! His name is Timothy of New Orleans!

Verse III: Second, the second coming of the Buddha is here! Siddhartha Gautama is alive and well today and now! His name is Richard Junwon Chi.

Verse IV: Together the Christ and the Buddha will work together to build New Jerusalem in Connecticut of the United States of America. There will be no homelessness in New Jerusalem. There will be no poverty in New jerusalem. There will be no hunger in New Jerusalem. And all who live in Connecticut or step foot in New Jerusalem shall be guaranteed a place in heaven. And the faithful will flock to Connecticut, New Jerusalem, the promised land, the land flowing with milk and honey, the church of Elijah’s black ravens.

Chapter XI:

Verse I: The succubus and George, and Rebecca, and Lindsay and Ben and Kwah all played Apples to Apples at…

Chapter XIV:

Verse ?: …nor the perverted nature of the conversation that followed. She did find it funny though, much to the Buddha’s chagrin.

Chapter XV:

Verse I: These are the seven revelations God, the Father Almighty, has revealed to His prophet Abpa N. Kwah regarding His Son, the Second Coming of Jesus Christ.

Verse II: First, his name is Timothy.

Verse III: Second, his mother calls him Timmy.

Verse IV: He is going to have been born and raised in New Orleans.

Verse V: In 2016, he was 17 years old.

Verse VI: He lurks 4chan.

Verse VII: Sometimes he posts in draw threads.

Verse VIII: He is of African-American descent, and his complexion will be black.

Chapter XVI: 

Verse I: Sammie did not appreciate being called the succubus, so we are now going to be calling her Sammie.

Verse II: However, Sammie is leaving tomorrow, so we shall see if she appears again in the New Gospel of Kwah.

Verse III: At her request, chapters 11-14 were removed, forever destroyed by Lord Shiva so that none may ever know of the wise, ancient secrets those chapters held.

Verse IV: And the following morning, everyone at the mental hospital around Kwah, including the staff, rebuked and scolded and chastised Kwah for his beliefs. Many rebuked him. And for the persecution Kwah received, God, the Father, blessed Kwah a thousand times over, and He promised to bless the Book of Kwah a thousandfold as well.

Chapter XVII:

Verse I: Kwah is not so proud and stubborn to deny salvation to those who deny him.

Verse II: However, all those who reject Jesus Christ will be at risk of the fires of Hell on that great day of judgement.

Verse III: However, those who accept Christ shall be saved, and those who accept Kwah shall be blessed beyond measure in the Kingdom of heaven.

Verse IV: Those who accept and trust in the words of the Christ and of the Kwah shall be trillionaires in the Kingdom of Heaven.

Verse V: But it is impossible to accept the word of Kwah without first accepting the word of Christ.

Verse VI: Therefore, all who come to know Kwah are saved, not because of Kwah, but because of the saving grace of Jesus Christ.

Verse III: It is through Christ that you are saved, and only Christ. Knowing Kwah is simply an assurance policy from God, the Father.

Chapter XVIII:

Verse I: There is going to be money in heaven. In heaven also, people need to exchange goods and services, and the primary currency in heaven are KC, Kingdom Credits, otherwise known as Heaven Dollars.

Verse II: Every time you do a good deed, you get some Heaven Dollars, AKA Kingdom Credits.

Verse III: A McDouble costs $2 in Kingdom Credits.

Verse IV: Every time you say “Amen” you get $1,000 KC.

Verse V: Every soul you save is $1,000,000 KC.

Every time you mention Kwah, or the Book of Kwah to someone, you also get $1,000 heaven dollars.

Verse VI: If you can get the other person to actually buy a copy of “The Book of Kwah” “Addendum” or “Where Stars Cannot Sing,” you shalll receive $1,000,000,000 KC {Or a billion Heaven Dollars.} If they just read the free version on their phone, it’ll only be $3,000 Heaven Dollars.

Chapter XIX:

Verse I: The stone that the builders rejected has become the keystone of the arch, and it is marvellous in our eyes.

Verse II: Many will reject the New Gospels of Kwah, but in doing so prophecy and scripture shall be fulfilled.

Verse III: Remember always, what lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. ~ Emerson

Verse IV: Remember also, that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck. ~ Tenzin Gyatso

Verse V: Remember this as well, now and forever, faith as small as a mustard seed can move mountains.

Chapter XX:

Verse I: The following is an excerpt from the Personal Prayer Journal of the New Gospel of Kwah.

Verse II: O LORD, Heavenly Grandfather, praised be Your name o God! Praised be all Your names! Praised be Yahweh! Praised be Jehovah! Praised be Allah! Praised be Brahman! Praised be the Name of the LORD! Praised be I Am Who I Am, and praised be Your Son, Jesus Christ of Nazareth! Praised be the King of Kings! Praised be the Prince of Peace! Praised be the Lord, Redeemer, and Savior of the world!

May this page be forever recorded on the Stone Tablets of Moses. With this holy page, I Moses, Cain, Siddhartha, Richard Junwon Chi, pray to God Most High for an end to all suffering on Earth by 2377. By that year may Satan finally repent and rejoin the angels in heaven. In the perfectly perfect name of Your only begotten Son, Jesus Christ, Timothy, Amen!

Verse III: The above was a prayer from Richard Junwon Chi, Abpa N. Kwah, Cain of Nod, Moses of Egypt, Siddhartha Gautama, praying for an end to suffering on Earth. All glory to God the Father when this prayer is answered with a resounding yes.

Chapter XXI:

Verse I: And heaven shall be whatever you wish it to be.

Verse II: If it be loving 100 women you desire, then 100 women you shall love.

Verse III: The same is true of women and men.

Verse IV: They shall feed you fruits and massage your feet.

Verse V: And homosexuality shall not bar you from heaven, for when Jesus died on the cross, He paid the price for all sins, past, present, and future. Kwah himself is bisexual.

Chapter XXII: 

Verse I: No one on this planet is going to hell without first standng trial before God, the Father Almighty, Creator of all Creation.

Verse II: The only ones standing trial are those whose names are written in the Book of Death.

Verse III: I, Kwah, Siddhartha, Moses, am the accuser and the prosecutor, and you will have to give an account for every thought, word, and deed before the LORD of Hosts, Jehovah.

Verse IV: Jeff Bezos’s name is written in the Book of Death for he has forgotten God in his blessings.

Verse V: Elon Musk and Bill Gates are written in the Book of Life, however. Just for comparison.

Verse VI: 99% of the world’s population is going to be guaranteed a place in heaven.

Verse VII: However, the 1% are going to stand trial before the LORD, and their only defender will be Jesus Christ of Nazareth, Timothy of New Orleans, who was and is black. (So don’t be racist.)

Verse VIII: The Buddha is Asian and the Christ is Black. KKK members and neonazis can go to hell for all we care.

Verse IX: Also in the Book of Death is King Herod of Jerusalem, for his slaughter of the babes in Bethlehem.

Verse X: Also written in the Book of Death are the names of many politicians and leaders and all manner of great men and women, for God has hardened their hearts to commit blasphemy against the Holy Spirit, the only unforgivable sin. And Kwah is the Holy Spirit made flesh. He who commits blasphemy against Kwah, against the Buddha, against Richard Junwon Chi are to have their names written in the Book of Death.

Chapter XXIII:

Verse I: All scripture must come to pass. Truly I tell you, not one iota of the law shall be erased.

Verse II: Fear God and give him glory, because the hour of judgment has come. Worship him who made the heavens, the earth, the sea and the springs of water.

Verse III: It has been said that any Christian who reads the Quran and does not convert to Islam is no true Christian.

Verse IV: Well, let it be said that any Muslim who reads the New Gospel of Kwah and does not join the First Church of Kwah is no true Muslim.

Verse V: For he who knows only one religion knows none, but he who knows all religions know one.

Verse VI: To all the atheists of the world, if you believe there is nothing after death, then so be it. For all atheists only, there shall be nothing for you after death. The faithful meanwhile are guaranteed a place in heaven.

Verse VII: If you believe in nothing, nothing shall happen to you when you die.

Chapter XXIV:

Verse I: A song for Kia

Verse II: O sweet one, I love who you are

Verse III: O sweet one, you hold a place in my heart

Verse IV: Forever and a day, I will cherish you.

Forever and a day, we will carry on through.

Verse V: Time and time again I may fail you so.

Time and time again would you forgive me of my woe.

Verse VI: When the spring of our youths has come to pass

And the winter of our lives has reached our days at last,

All I’d ever want is to hold you close

In an embrace that few could ever know

Verse VII: And my heart beats for you like the drumming of old Mars

For when I gaze into your eyes, they shine brighter than the stars.

And should I ask you for your hand, please say I do.

Because there is no one else, 

For I love you.

Chapter XXV:

Verse I: Repent and rejoice! Repent and rejoice, for the Kingdom of Heaven is very, very, very near. The signs in the Book of Revelation are come to pass. The stars have fallen to the Earth. The Trumpet has been blown. Soon the Christ shall come down from the clouds in all his glory.

Verse II: We;re going to use drones and stuff to literally bring Jesus down to Earth, or TImothy I should say.

Verse III: To the seven churches, stop bickering amongst yourselves and accept the New Gospels of Kwah as scripture.

Verse IV: To all the Buddhists of the world, this is the handwritten word of the Buddha himself, please do not scoff at it.

Verse V: This text is holy. This text is infallible and divinely inspired. God is using the Buddha to write a new bible. Believe, and you will be saved. Have faith in Jesus, and you will be saved. Have faith in Siddhartha, and you will have peace of mind.

Verse VI: God Himself was the One who told Richard that he was once Siddhartha – And Richard swears that if he is not Siddhartha, that he will burn in hell forever. But he is the Buddha, so he will see you in heaven, and he will personally meet and greet and love every person who is a part of the Church of Kwah.

Chapter XXVI:

Verse I: To what can I compare this generation? They are like children sitting in the marketplaces and calling out to others: “We played the flute for you, and you did not dance; we sang a dirge, and you did not mourn.

Verse II: Please read A Dirge for Mars, the first book in the series being the New Gospel of Kwah: Where Stars Cannot Sing.

Verse III: Where Stars Cannot Sing is not a work of fiction, save for the fictitious bits involving Noam Chomsky. It is a true version of events of how Mars went from the homeworld of humanity to the dead, barren planet it is today.

Chapter XXVII:

Verse I: And all the major corporations that steal from the Earth and pollute her must repent, lest the fury of God rest upon that company. Nestle especially.

Verse II: But the LORD blesses Tesla and Apple. Them, the LORD loves. But Tyson and Nestle, them the LORD hates.

Verse III: But be careful about pointing out the speck of sawdust in your neighbor;s eye while there is a huge tree in your own eye.

Verse IV: So saith the LORD, the Heavenly Father Who Art in Heaven,

Verse V: All employees of Tesla, Apple, and Google will forever be guaranteed places in heaven.

Chapter XXVIII:
Verse I: And to his disciples does Kwah beseech them:
Verse II: Go out and spread the good news!

Verse III: Preach this message: “The Kingdom of Heaven is very, very, very near!”

Verse IV: Timothy of New Orleans is the Christ come again!

Verse V: Preach the New Gospels of Kwah all over the internet! Do so, and you will be blessed a trillion-fold in the Kingdom of Heaven!

Verse VI: Also, friend Richard Chi on facebook! And message him! He will be happy to respond!

Verse VII: In the name of Jesus Christ have the nations put their hope, and I tell you now, Jesus Christ has come again, and He has taken the name of Timothy.

Verse VIII: And I tell you, the buddha who the nations have never really hoped in to begin with, has come again, and he has taken the name of Richard.

The End of the New Gospel of Kwah Part III: Preaching to the Choirs in Heaven